Dear Mr.Brown,

Just a quick word of legislative advice. Start addressing the cause. Not the solution.

So you want to ban Methadrone? Sounds like the start of a lyric to a song, but do you really wanna? I mean, really really wanna? Or so the bridge would go. Once again, this is a sloppy solution to a problem that arose because you upgraded/banned one of Meph's forefather drugs. This is a dangerous move and also entirely pointless. Clever young minds have a way of outsmarting and outmanouvering existing governmental laws.

Sooner or later, "The New Meph" will be on the scene, which shall inevitably be responded to in the same tired, predictable way as ever: media flame-fanning; at least one death; parental pressure snipes Parliament et voila: BAN! RESTRICTED! UPGRADED! But PROBLEM SOLVED?

Word on the street is that the so-called New Meph is nothing more than some bi-product from the simple cactus. Is banning household plants feasible? Is it possilbe that the nanny state has gone too far? Banning fertiliser was one thing, but plant-life? Perhaps our earnest, yet out of touch government ought to spend less time mooning in their parliamentary safehouses and more time out in consituencies. I am sure the resulting information would be more than just refreshing but also highly informative.

So, why Mr. Brown, do kids do drugs in the first place, you wonder?

Boredom. Cinema tickets are too high. Train fares are too high. Culturally you seem to have outlawed alcohol in the home, hence why we have such high teen binge drinking rates in the UK once they hit 15. Resolves broken Britain (OO, I am such a Tory syco) and reap the rewards. I would also encourage a Youth Parlimant that wasn't filled with snotty middle class wanker kids. I am that very breed and know how disenchanting it is. More variety breeds greater understanding.

The more brushes we have with people, the more developped, sane and civilised we become.

Yours somewhat riled,
L