Dear Ms.Alexander,

I am currently sitting somewhat dejected in your fashion cupboard (which is no more a cupboard than I am a saint) alone, hopelessly bored and witlessly unstigmatised. And have been for the best part of 6 hours, aka the entire day.

Please give me a chore. I am at that fustrating stage where I will shine your sartorially unchallenged shoes. In short, I am bored out of my mind. Today I am wearing vintage Dior- you haven't even noticed. I feel like a rejected lover, shunned to live out my days in dire solitude with only the air con and Youtube for company.

Left alone to my thoughts, I have begun to do the one thing no wannabe fashion journo should ever have to do- think. Think about politics.

My main wrangle of the day is with regards to the maddening way in which people are abandonning the Conservative party after months, nay years, of their hard campaigning. Says my beloved Boris in this morning's Daily Telegraph: Is there something in the water? And I for one am inclined to agree. The politically unsavvy are flirting with what they shouldn't be- Liberal Democrat(ism). And it's showing. Liberalists out there may have come a cropper with their whimsical half-wit policies but question is when will they come down from the fence and start producing something realistic and of substance. It is interesting that no-one has yet picked up on the fact that Clegg's own policies are nothing more than watered down variations of a Cameron theme.

O, how the heart breaks.
Do these fools not realise that a vote for Lib dem is a vote for Brown.
A majority for LD is impossible given the, ahem, seating arrangement in the HoC. Hung Parliament alludes to more in its nameasake than the unintiated realise.
Hung Parliament, hangs democracy.
Hung Parliament, hangs progress.
Hung Parliament, hangs the sort of resolution needed to get Britian back to where it belongs.
The idea of Hung Parliament ought be tied in sailors knots before May 6th. Vote Tory.